The Truth About First Looks: What Nobody Tells You
Spoiler Alert: First looks aren’t for everyone.
But they’re also not just a Pinterest trend or something your planner suggested to “save time.” There’s more to this decision than logistics, and since I’ve photographed a lot of first looks — and also a lot of couples who skipped them — I want to walk you through the real pros, cons, and emotional moments that come with both.
Whether you’re trying to stay traditional, avoid a timeline crunch, or just feel less nervous walking down the aisle, this one’s for you.
What is a First Look?
A first look is when you and your partner see each other before the ceremony — usually in a more private, intimate setting. No guests. No crowd. Just you two (and me, hiding behind something with a camera, if you choose). It’s become a popular alternative to the “aisle moment,” and while it’s definitely not required, it can totally shift the energy of your day.
Reasons Couples Love Doing a First Look:
It calms your nerves.
You’d be surprised how many people say the moment they saw their partner, their anxiety melted. You get that deep breath, the hug, the “holy sh*t, this is happening” moment — before walking into a ceremony full of people.It gives you more time together.
On a typical wedding day, you’re surrounded by guests, vendors, and constant movement. A first look carves out time for just the two of you. Honestly, it might be the only time you get alone together all day.It helps with the timeline.
Doing a first look opens the door for wedding party photos, family portraits, and couple shots before the ceremony. That means more time to hang at cocktail hour and more time to just
be together on one of the most important days of your lives without hustling and bustling on different sides of your venue all day long.It gives space for real emotion.
No performance. No crowd. Just raw, real reactions — which, let’s be honest, make for some pretty unforgettable photos.
Reasons Some Couples Skip the First Look:
You’re set on tradition.
If that aisle moment has always been your dream, and you want that anticipation to build all the way up to the ceremony — you do you, boo and don’t let anyone pressure you into a different plan.You want to get ready separately and not cross paths until it’s go-time.
Some couples love the symbolism of seeing each other for the first time surrounded by their loved ones. And honestly? That can be just as powerful.You have a later ceremony and prefer golden hour portraits.
If your ceremony is close to sunset, skipping a first look might be the better lighting move — especially if you plan a couple's session right after.
So... Should You Do One?
There’s no right answer here. It really comes down to how you want to feel.
Ask yourself:
Do you get overwhelmed by emotion or crowds?
Do you want to spend more time together on your wedding day?
Is it important to you to stick with tradition — or are you open to doing things differently?
And if you’re still not sure — let’s talk it through. I’ll always help you build a timeline that makes the most sense for you, whether that includes a first look or not.
P.S. — I Made You a First Look Playlist
If you do end up doing one, and you’re the kind of person who wants to set the vibe with music (or cry even harder), I made a playlist just for this moment. You can listen [here].